What's Newsworthy in Our World!

We're Proud to Announce: 1.) We are pleased to annouce that Marlene is one of only 15 select professionals in the world to hold the following dual designations: CSP (Certified Speaking Professional) and CMC (Certified Management Consultant). The CSP - given by the National Speakers Association, composed of 3,700 international members - is earned after 5 years of submitted paperwork, verification by clients, and approval by a board, showing expertise as a professional speaker. The CMC - given by the Institute of Management Consultants composed of 2,900 international members - is earned only after 3 years of submitted paperwork, verification by clients, plus passing both a written examination and an oral interview, showing expertise as a management consultant. We're proud to offer our clients this expertise and these credentials.

We're Also Pleased to Announce: 1.) We're proud of Marlene's Web site Design ability. We were honored when Marlene was asked by her local District Governor to redesign the Rotary District web site and the Youth Exchange site. We spent many weeks doing so, and entered them in The Best of Rotary Web contest. Both sites were nominated as among the best 10 in their respective categories, and in the final voting, one of the sites placed second, and the other placed first! Our TechnoTouch site also won an award as one of the 500 best reference sites on the Web. Click here to view these and some of our other client sites. -Marlene & the MarmeL team       Our Latest Awards ... In June of 2001, at the Rotary International Convention, we were awarded the Rotary Zone 31 (NE America) Best District Website and Best District Internet Communication Officer. What an honor and what a pleasure. In July of 2001, in Syracuse NY, we were chosen as one of the Top 20 Women owned businesses in Central New York. A pleasure to be in the company of other neat and worthy women professionals. Check out some other recent pictures.

For Those Who Take Life Too Seriously A day without sunshine is like... night. On the other hand, you have different fingers. I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you. I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges. Honk if you love peace and quiet. Remember half the people you know are below average. Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how popular it remains? Nothing is fool-proof to a talented fool. He who laughs last thinks slowest. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. I intend to live forever - so far so good. Borrow money from a pessimist - they don't expect it back. If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends? Quantum mechanics: The dreams stuff is made of. The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes. A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it. For every action there is an equal and opposite criticism. Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks. Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with. No one is listening until you make a mistake. Success always occurs in private and failure in full view. The colder the x-ray table the more of your body is required on it. The hardness of butter is directly proportional to the softness of the bread. The likelihood that your nose will itch is in direct proportion to how wet your nails are/ or how dirty hour hands are To steal ideas from one person is plagerism; to steal from many is research. Two wrongs are only the beginning. The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard. Change is inevitable except from vending machines. Plan to be spontaneous - tomorrow. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments. If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving isn't for you.

Flight of the Manager A man is flying in a hot air balloon and realizes he is lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised my friend I would meet him half an hour ago, but I don't know where I am." The man below says, "Yes. You are in a hot air balloon, hovering approximately 30 feet above this field. You are between 40 and 42 degrees N. latitude, and between 58 and 60 degrees W. longitude." "You must be an engineer," says the balloonist. "I am," replies the man. "How did you know?" "Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your information, and the fact is, I am still lost." The man below says, "You must be a manager." "I am," replies the balloonist, "but how did you know?" "Well," says the man, "you don't know where you are, or where you are going. You have made a promise which you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. The fact is, you are in the exact same position you were in before we met, but now it is somehow my fault."

The Sculptor's Attitude I woke up early today, excited over all I get to do before the clock strikes midnight. I have responsibilities to fulfill today. I am important. My job is to choose what kind of day I am going to have. Today I can complain because the weather is rainy or ... I can be thankful that the grass is getting watered for free. Today I can feel sad that I don't have more money or ... I can be glad that my finances encourage me to plan my purchases wisely and guide me away from waste. Today I can grumble about my health or ... I can rejoice that I am alive. Today I can lament over all that my parents didn't give me when I was growing up or ...I can feel grateful that they allowed me to be born. Today I can cry because roses have thorns or ... I can celebrate that thorns have roses. Today I can mourn my lack of friends or ... I can excitedly embark upon a quest to discover new relationships. Today I can whine because I have to go to work or ... I can shout for joy because I have a job to do. Today I can complain because I have to go to school or ... eagerly open my mind and fill it with rich new tidbits of knowledge. Today I can murmur dejectedly because I have to do housework or I can feel honored because the Lord has provided shelter for my mind, body and soul. Today stretches ahead of me, waiting to be shaped. And here I am, the sculptor who gets to do the shaping. What today will be like is up to me. I get to choose what kind of day I will have! Have a GREAT DAY ... unless you have other plans.

The Carpenter   An elderly carpenter was ready to retire. He told his employer-contractor of his plans to leave the house building business and live a more leisurely life with his wife enjoying his extended family. He would miss the paycheck, but he needed to retire. They could get by. The contractor was sorry to see his good worker go and asked if he could build just one more house as a personal favor. The carpenter's heart was not in his work. He resorted to shoddy workmanship and used inferior materials. It was an unfortunate way to end his career. When the carpenter finished his work and the builder came to inspect the house, the contractor handed the front-door key to the carpenter. "This is your house," he said, "my gift to you." What a shock! What a shame! If he had only known he was building his own house, he would have done it all so differently. Now he had to live in the home he had built none too well. So it is with us. We build our lives in a distracted way, reacting rather than acting, willing to put up less than the best. At important points we do not give the job our best effort. Then with a shock we look at the situation we have created and find that we are now living in the house we have built. If we had realized, we would have done it differently. Think of yourself as the carpenter. Think about your house. Each day you hammer a nail, place a board, or erect a wall. Build wisely. It is the only life you will ever build. Even if you live it for only one day more, that day deserves to be lived graciously and with dignity. Your life today is the result of your past attitudes and choices. Your life tomorrow will be the result of your attitudes and choices you make today. - author unknown (submitted by Al Kalter) Twas the Night Before Easter... By Larry Bowser, revised by Joe & Claudia Keary Twas the night before Easter. All was calm and laid back. Fred the mouse in the kitchen snarfed down a late snack. The eggs were all dyed but still drippy and sticky-- to be honest they looked just a little bit icky! There were big jelly beans, chocolate bunnies and such. And as Fred stuffed his face he sighed "This is too much!" Joe & Claudia were in bed watching late night tv, while munching saltines with low-sodium brie. Then a sudden commotion rang out in the night. It shook Joe & Claudia really gave them a fright. Joe's hair stood on end, and his eyes bugged out big-- Claudia whipped off the covers and knocked off her wig. They lunged to the window, yanked open the blinds-- what they saw was amazing; it boggled their minds: across the night sky, with a noise like the dickens, soared a minivan drawn by 8 overgrown chickens! At the wheel sat a bunny--cute, fuzzy and fat-- in designer blue jeans and a "St Joe's Regional" hat! Like a speeding space shuttle, those chickens they flew, as the van driver called to each hen in his crew; "Now Ashley! Now Sheila! Now, Kelsey & Bo! On Bethany! Liza! on Daphne & Flo!!!" the van made it's landing lickety split--- nearly whiped out the shrubs and the barbeque pit! Then up on the roof, much to Joe's consternation, they squawked of the egg prices and space navigation! They made so much noise that Joe started to stammer, "If you guys dont shut up you'll get thrown in the slammer!" Fuzzy hopped down the chimney, amidst all this racket, and emerged from the fireplace, adjusting his jacket. This bunny was chic, he had class, he had flair-- not your average bozo, not your typical hare! His ears were enormous, his huge overbite was right under a nose like a pink neon light. His manner was smooth, he was hip, he was cool; this floppy-eared bunny was no fuzzy fool. "While I'm in here, he smiled, Everybody relaxes-- I'm not selling storm windows, won't audit your taxes! I'm just here to bring you guys some fun and delight-- eat , drink, and be merry! Lets party tonight!!" So they sipped a diet soda and swapped silly jokes. Those birds and their bunny just being plain folks. Then flop-ears said "hey friends we've had quite a ball, but my chickens and I are now due in St Paul"! He crossed both his eyes then wiggled one ear, and he yelled to his chicken team, "we're outta here!" As the minivan rose in the 3am sky, he called out "Later Joe! And to you Claudia, goodbye!" As he sped out of sight, his two friends heard him say. ....HAPPY EASTER TO ALL - HAVE A BEAUTIFUL DAY!!

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